


Pretty Little Doll

by Scorpius_Wears_Short_Skirts



Series: YCTH!Verse [5]
Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Angel Dust Being Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel), Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, M/M, Podfic Welcome, Polyamory, Shrinking, Silly, Size Difference, Soft Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), The polyamory is a background ship, Trans Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-26 22:55:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 17,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21962473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scorpius_Wears_Short_Skirts/pseuds/Scorpius_Wears_Short_Skirts
Summary: Angel Dust finds himself on the business end of Sir Pentious's newest invention and has to cope with being much smaller than he's used to being.
Relationships: Alastor/Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel), Charlie Magne/Vaggie, Husk & Niffty (Hazbin Hotel)
Series: YCTH!Verse [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1569163
Comments: 127
Kudos: 981





	1. Ray Gun

**Author's Note:**

> I keep having ideas I can't stop.

It had been a very strange day. For good behavior, Angel had been allowed out of the Happy Hotel as a trust exercise. Usually when he had such freedom he would find some rando to throw him money for a quick fuck but he didn't feel like it today. Instead, he called Cherri to see what she felt like doing.

 _"Don't you have a boyfriend? Thought you'd want a date night with him."_ Cherri asked over the phone.

"Fiancé. He sneaks me out for dates and I see him every day. I'm lucky if I see you once a week. Not my fault you're still single." Angel joked.

 _"I like being single."_ Cherri laughed. _"People just disappoint me. I can romance myself and if I need a fuck there's plenty of sleazes to pick from."_

"You even buy yourself flowers?" 

_"Yeah! It's good for my brain or something. Probably."_ Cherri said, and Angel could hear something rustling around. _"Let me get dressed and I'll meet you at the Red Room."_

"That place is creepy."

 _"Dude I've seen your boyfriend tear someone's throat out with his teeth and you looked at him like it was the prettiest thing you'd ever seen."_ Cherri huffed. _"Come on, bitch, it's explosion night!"_

"...Fine." Angel sighed, not bothering to correct her again, and hung up on her as he headed the way toward the torture themed bar. 

The drinks there were always good, he knew. He just didn't like the fact that there were always stage shows that were more gratuitous gore than they were actual performance. Sure, Alastor had a thing for evisceration but at least he was artful and classy about it. Come to think of it, he'd even let Al cut him open if he wanted because he knew the Radio Demon would be careful and respectful with him. Hell willing, it might even get Alastor's engine going for once, not that Angel would push him. It was fun to think about but he knew it was the sort of thing that should stay in his head. Compared to that, the Red Room was just gross.

The sound of manic, forced laughter reached Angel's ears, drawing him from his thoughts. He looked up, seeing the armored dirigible of Sir Pentious.

"Ha! What luck to find _you_ again. And without your female compatriot! Care for a rematch?"

"Oh fuck off. I'm not doin' this today!" Angel shouted back, running as he noticed a gun on the side of the blimp pointing toward him. "I've been mostly good for weeks! Don't fuck it up for me!" Some sort of energy blast hit the concrete behind him and Angel ran faster, only to stumble and fall as the heel of his boot snapped off. "Motherfucker!"

The gun rotated and fired faster than Angel could pick himself up, so he shielded his face with his arms and hoped Charlie wouldn't get the wrong idea when this inevitably wound up on the news. The blast hit him, stinging all over but not really doing any real damage that he could tell. The weird thing was that his clothing had started to grow around him. No, he realised a moment later, he was shrinking out of them. A minute passed and he watched the cackling snake in the blimp fly away before he crawled out of his clothes. Naked and only about five inches tall, he had to search through what felt like miles of cloth to find his phone which was almost as big as he was. He called Cherri back.

"Hey, Sugartits. Change of plans. I need you to come get me. I'm on the corner of Styx and Manson avenue. Watch your step." He said, standing over the phone since he couldn't pick it up.

 _"What happened?"_ Cherri asked, sounding worried.

"Oh, just some bullshit." Angel answered. "You wouldn't happen to have any doll clothes, would'ja?"

_"I'm not five. I'm on my way."_

Angel hung up and dragged his phone and wallet into an out of the way space halfway under a milkcrate, grateful that this had happened in a spot with plenty of hiding spaces for someone his size. He had to leave his clothes as they were far too big to carry, and as expected some freak inevitably stole them. Angel let it happen. He was too small to be picking fights right now even if he was in the right. A few more minutes and Cherri was within view, looking around for him with confusion clear on her face.

"Down here!" Angel called, peeking out from under the milk crate and waving his arms.

Cherri looked down, her confusion only growing more severe before she finally processed what she was seeing. She then covered her mouth, snickering behind her hands.

"Oh my gosh, you're adorable!" She said crouching down. "What happened to you?"

She held out her hand for Angel to hop on, but he only handed her his phone and wallet first. No way he was losing either of those. Only one she secured those did he climb up her arm to sit on her shoulder and hide himself in her hair. Tiny or not, he didn't feel like giving a free show to strangers and his parts were nobody's business unless they were paying. He also didn't like his feet being on display ever, two-toed claws with the velcro-hooklike fur fanning out. He hated them.

"I've always been adorable." Angel huffed, deflecting. "Sir Pin-wheel made a new gun… Can you take me home? I gotta figure out what to do about this."

"Sure thing, Angie." Cherri said, slowly standing and walking the way of the hotel. "Do I wanna know why you've decided on the tits-and-ass out look today?"

"Look bitch, I was fully dressed before I got shrunk." Angel bit back, but their banter was friendly no matter how annoyed it may have seemed to anyone else.


	2. Poor Fit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor discovers Angel's new state.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't stop writing for this shit.

Cherri got Angel to the Happy Hotel safe and sound, setting him down on the bar countertop.

"What the fuck." Husk said, squinting down at the still-naked spider. 

"Get enough of an eyeful, buster? Where's Cha-cha?" Angel asked, walking across the counter to grab a shot glass. It took him a considerable effort to lift it, but he managed. "Mind tossin' some tequila in here?"

"She's busy." Husk said as he poured a very small amount of tequila into the glass. "She started hosting group therapy in the courtyard. Which you would know if you ever looked at the corkboard." He said, pointing toward a space on the wall across the lobby where several flyers were tacked up.

With the added weight of liquid, Angel couldn't even tip it. He groaned, annoyed until Cherri reached over the bar to grab a small coffee stirrer, snapping it in half so Angel could use it as a straw. She stuck it in the glass for him, ignoring Husk's disapproving hiss at someone else touching his stuff. 

Alastor chose then to walk into the lobby from the kitchen, doing a double take when he noticed what was happening on the bar. He squinted, not sure if he was seeing what he thought he was seeing, but a blink and a shake didn't dispel the strange sight. There was definitely his spider, five inches tall and completely exposed. He walked over quickly, taking a handkerchief out of his pocket to drape over the spider. 

"Hey babe." Angel greeted, adjusting the cloth around his back, bringing it forward around him like a towel and then pulling the corners up to tie around the back of his neck to make it into a makeshift dress. 

"You've clearly had an adventure!" Alastor said cheerfully, covering the fact that he was worried.

"Wrong place, wrong time. Got shot with a weird ray gun." Angel said with a shrug, the drink working much faster on his smaller body to have him incredibly calm already.

Cherri let out an odd, annoyed ticking noise. "I'm gonna tie that snake bastard in a knot."

"Snake," Alastor repeated. "Lord Pantaloons, was it?"

"Close enough!" Angel giggled, nodding his head. "Eh don't hurt him too bad. We might need him to reverse this." Angel said, gesturing to himself.

"Understood." Alastor said darkly, turning and heading toward the door with purposeful steps. 

"Hey!" Angel called after him. "Wait a minute!"

"Yes, darling?" Alastor asked, turning his head a little further than what looked natural.

"Take me with you?" 

"I'm afraid it may not be safe for someone of your current stature." Alastor said, but turned and approached to lift the spider up. "But I suppose you'll be safer with me than running amuck and getting yourself stepped on if you wind up on the floor." He brought Angel to his chest and the spider climbed up and into his suit pocket. Alastor then turned to address Cherri. "Thank you, Miss Bomb, for bringing him home."

"Uh, yeah. No problem dude." She shrugged.

The problem with looking for someone who lived in a blimp was that there was no telling where the blimp was. Hours of searching turned up nothing. It didn't help that Angel was getting tired, the warmth of the pocket he was in and Alastor's heartbeat pairing with the tequila in his too-small system to lull him into dozing. Alastor was not unaware of this and eventually gave up the search for now in favor of going to his own home under the Radio Tower.

If Angel was going to have to stay small for an extended time then he would need clothes at the very least and Alastor knew very well how to sew. As a strange twist of luck, Alastor still had the voodoo doll of Angel and the clothes of it were detachable. The doll's outfit would need adjusting but it was definitely a quick fix.

"Is that me?" Angel slurred at he looked out of the pocket to see the doll. "That's so cute."

"Husk called it creepy but I'm glad you see it differently." Alastor said, stroking the doll's hair only for Angel to feel it.

"Woah!" Angel said, climbing down from the pocket and jumping a surprising distance to the desk to get a better look at the doll. "I always thought I was hallucinatin' when that shit happened."

"Please don't be angry with me. I haven't used it in ages." Alastor said.

"I ain't mad. You never hurt me with it. It's just surprisin' is all. You're a big softy."

"Oh hush." Alastor huffed, almost offended at the thought that he was anything other than a monster. But, he supposed, Angel was an exception he would always make. "Only for you, sha."

"Sweet, soft, big baby. So big. Huge." Angel rambled, clearly feeling his drink. "I wanna climb your antlers. You got fuckin' trees on your head."

Alastor chuckled as Angel jumped back onto him, losing the handkerchief he was dressed in in the process. Angel climbed far too well at the size he was, effortlessly making his way up Alastor's chest to his neck. Alastor was proud of himself that he only flinched a little when Angel got to his hair, pulling himself up like he was scaling a mountain. It was a different story when Angel got to his ear, however, the resulting twitch nearly slapping the spider off.

"Reflex!" Alastor explained quickly.

"Nah it's fine. I'm sturdy!" Angel replied cheerfully, finally reaching an antler and swinging himself up onto it to sit in the crook between prongs. "Oh hey, they're fuzzy."

"Yes, they're starting to velvet." Alastor agreed. "It happens every few years, always late winter. Luckily not every year like a real deer, but still enough to be annoying."

"Ugh, tell me about it. I still bleed every fuckin' month." Angel groaned, happy to commiserate in the solidarity of having different but similarly annoying biological functions to deal with.

Alastor was careful not to knock Angel down as he pulled his sewing tin out of his drawer to adjust the doll's outfit. He then started to make other bits of clothing and Angel was happy to watch him sew, offering up suggestions at first before quieting. After some time, Alastor felt a sort of little _plop_ between his antlers, alerting him to the fact Angel had fallen asleep. He picked the spider off of his head and put him down in a shoebox full of cotton stuffing. 

Alastor brought Angel to his bedroom, setting the shoebox down on his nightstand. He had gotten in the habit of sleeping in Angel's bed with the spider's long limbs around him that it somehow felt foreign to be alone in his own. Then again, his bed was less of a true bed and more along the lines of a giant cushion spanning a bit over half of the floor to accommodate his much larger form's size. He couldn't even fit in Angel's room in his real skin, let alone the spider's bed. Sure, he could maintain the humanoid form in his sleep when necessary but it was more restful to not be confined in a too-small body. He wondered if Angel was feeling a similar sense of discomfort from being so small. He hoped not.


	3. Comfortable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel and Alastor have a pleasant morning before Angel remembers he has responsibilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had the past two days off but I go back to work tomorrow so my uploading may slow down a bit. Sorry for that in advance.

When Alastor awoke he was in his large deer form, having shifted in his sleep since he had the room to do so. He worried for a brief moment that he would have to be careful to avoid crushing Angel accidentally, but remembered that he had left the other on the nightstand. He hadn't stayed there, Alastor noted, as he noticed movement from the corner of his eye. Hanging from his antler on a string of silk wrapped around his leg was the spider himself, swinging and spinning gleefully like he was on aerial silks.

"Mornin' Smiles!" Angel greeted when he noticed Alastor was up and watching him.

"Mornin' sha." Alastor returned warmly, though the form he was in put a bit of a rattle in his voice. 

"This is the first time I've seen you like this without you bein' hurt." Angel observed, twisting and hooking an elbow around the silk to get himself sideways. He swiveled his free leg widely to get the loose silk around his thigh, then pulled himself up and did the same with his other leg so he could sit upright. "You ain't hurt are you?"

"No." Alastor assured, gingerly rocking his skull to swing Angel without throwing him, seeing how much freedom he had to safely move. 

"Hey with you so big and me so tiny it's a good thing we don't screw, huh?" Angel joked. "That'd have to get real fuckin' creative."

"Vulgar." Alastor scolded, but his tone lacked any real bite. 

"You know it!"

Alastor stood up and gave his head a little flick, swinging Angel around to land somewhere on the back of his neck. He could feel tiny hands latch onto his fur and he was satisfied that his fiancé was secure enough that he could step through a shadow to get outside. Doors weren't an option with his size. He stamped a hoof, sending several shadows out in every direction with the intentions of finding the snake.

"Ugh, warn me before you take me through whatever the fuck that was. Felt like gettin' flattened." Angel whined.

"Sorry. I don't notice it…" Alastor apologized.

"It's cool." Angel huffed. "So how come I never get to see you this way?"

"Few do." Alastor said, flicking an ear. "It's scary. I don't want to scare y' off..."

"You ain't scary to me." Angel dismissed, and Alastor tried not to take it as an insult as he took a walk around the tower to check on his wards. "Kinda cute actually."

"You're cute." Alastor snapped back, though he stayed cheerful. "Like a flea t' me right now!"

"Don't tempt me to start suckin' blood, babe. I'm a handful at least." Angel snorted, and Alastor felt him skitter down his neck and onto his back. "You're just fuckin' massive. Feel like I'm in a wheatfield."

Alastor chuckled, the sound reverberating through his body and making Angel feel like he was experiencing the loveliest earthquake. Alastor just continued to walk. His wards were fine so he had no need to worry about possible intrusion. He was in his natural skin for the first time in a long time by choice. His sweet spider was with him. All in all, a pretty good morning indeed.

"Ah, shit." Angel said suddenly, running up Alastor's neck to get to his skull.

"What's wrong?"

"I gotta feed Nuggets. They've been alone all night!" Angel cried. "I'm an awful daddy."

"It'll be fine." Alastor assured. "Tie y'self down. We gon' have a run."

"Okay!" Angel affirmed, and climbed up the antler he had been swinging from before. He made more silk and strapped himself tightly to the base of the antler and patted Alastor's skull. "Ready when you are!"

Angel was not as ready as he thought he was, nearly getting whiplash before he braced himself better. Regardless, it was a fun ride, even funnier when Alastor began chasing the average sized demons unlucky enough to cross his path. He didn't eat them, but Angel got a first row seat to Alastor snapping his jaws at anyone he deemed too close. Surprisingly, not a single one was seriously hurt.

When they got near the hotel Alastor stopped, laying his head on Charlie's balcony to allow Angel to untie himself and step down somewhere safe. Then Alastor shrank down, form shifting into his more manageable ont. He picked the webs off of his antler, then let himself into the hotel. He went up to the top floor where Charlie's and Vaggie's room was, knocking politely.

Charlie answered, still in her pajamas. Vaggie was still in bed, sleeping like a log.

"Oh thank Satan. Have you seen Angel?" Charlie asked. "I was told he was with you but he didn't come home at all last night."

"Not to worry, dear." Alastor dismissed, and waved a hand to send shadows to open up the balcony.

Angel sprinted across the floor, not wanting to stay outside by himself. Charlie stared, frozen and confused.

"What." She said, pointed to the spider as he was climbing up Alastor's pant leg. 

"I got shot." Angel said, as if that explained everything. "At least I'm dressed now! Look, I gotta go take care of my baby before I do anything else." 

"I have so many questions." 

"Piggy first!" Angel insisted.

"Yes. Piggy first." Alastor agreed, turning to leave as Angel made it up to his pocket. "I just stopped by to let Angel in. You have a good morning, dear." 

Charlie shut the door and got back into her bed, Vaggie curling around her on contact.

"What wazzat about?" Vaggie asked, slurring as she was still half asleep.

"I'm pretty sure I just had an aneurysm." Charlie answered, squinting at the ceiling.


	4. Different

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel has to process the change.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes Bad Feels just hit out of nowhere.

Angel realized when he and Alastor got to his room that he was far too small for pig care and while he was glad Nuggets still recognised him and very happy to see him, he would have to delegate daddy duty to Alastor. Alastor, having never enjoyed the company of an animal was clueless. Sure, he got along well enough with the one specific pig, he had never done more than walk them or watched them play with Angel. He had assumed that to feed the pig only meant to fill the water and food bowls. He hadn't realized Angel had a _ritual_. A ritual that Angel was too small to carry out himself.

"You gotta pick 'em up and pat their tummy when they're done." Angel insisted from his perch on his makeup box on the vanity. 

"Angel, a pig of all things can digest near anythin' with no need o' help." Alastor said. "I've fed pigs _bones._ "

"They're a designer breed. They're inbred as shit to basically be a baby forever. Like chihuahuas." Angel countered. "Come on, pick 'em up. Just like a baby. See?" Angel demonstrated the hold with a foam foundation blender.

Alastor sighed and decided to humor Angel, picking the pig up and turning it onto its back in the crook of his arm. Nuggets oinked sweetly, wiggling their hooves in the air. Alastor squinted back as he began to pat the pig's belly, feeling quite silly about the whole situation.

"Look at you. Fuckin' natural daddy, aren't'cha?" Angel cooed, not even teasing.

"I detest children." Alastor denied, glaring even as he continued to pat the pig. "How long do I need to do this?"

"They'll get wigglier. You'll know." Angel said, putting the piece of foam down. 

Angel took a walk around the top of his vanity marveling at the scale of things before stepping up to the mirror. He was too small to use almost any of his makeup and he felt a bit naked without it. He also couldn't brush his fur properly and it was already taking a toll on his self-image. He felt like most of his good qualities revolved around his looks so it was rough for him to see himself so plain.

Alastor took notice of the sudden shift of mood in the other, but he wasn't sure of the cause. Luckily Nuggets chose then to wiggle, signalling that the ridiculousness of pig-patting could be over and Alastor let them down to free up his hands. 

"Walk's next." Angel murmured as he saw Alastor let Nuggets down in the mirror, his tone losing the previous amusement. 

"We'll get 'round to it." Alastor assured. 

"Now. They'll shit on the carpet." Angel said dryly. "I'll stay up here…" 

Alastor considered calling Niffty to walk the pig, but realised a moment later that Angel was trying to ask for a moment of space without being direct about it. Alastor wanted to stay, to be there if needed, but Angel needed to be alone for a while and Alastor would give him that. 

"Be back soon, den." Alastor obliged, putting a leash on Nuggets and shutting the door quietly as he led the pig out. 

Angel let out a deep breath as soon as the door closed, tears brimming in his eyes as he sat down. He covered his face in three of his hands, the fourth gripping his hair. May as well ruin that too, he decided. What even was he to anyone if he wasn't pretty? Sure maybe Pentious could fix him so he'd be big enough for cosmetics and his good clothes but how long would that take? Would it even work? Until then, what did he have to offer anyone?

No, the rational part of Angel's brain finally kicked in sometime while he was in the middle of sobbing his tiny eyes out. He was more than a pretty face. He could be charming when he tried. He was funny. He was smart in a way that most didn't seem to recognise but his friends saw it. Alastor saw it. This episode was bound to happen after such a sudden change in his life and it would pass. He just had to get used to it so he could manage it. 

"Damn, Charlie's pep talks come in handy." Angel muttered to himself, sniffling as he reiterated her advice to himself. 

While Angel hadn't even been aware of the group therapy Charlie decided to host, he had been seeing her one-on-one. She had been offering open counselling from her office to those who needed it. It wasn't a regular or scheduled thing but if Angel was having a particularly bad day he'd cave and go see her sometimes. Mainly she had taught him how to try to prevent panic attacks if he recognised the starting signs of one early. He even felt a little proud of himself now that he had put her advice to practical use.

Angel stood up, wiped his eyes, and took a closer look at himself. He crossed his lower set of arms and put the higher set on his hips as he glared as his reflection for a second like he was trying to assert a sense of dominance over himself. 

"Blessing in disguise, bitch. Mascara would've run." He told himself, again using Charlie's advice to find something positive. Turning to Alastor's example, he plastered on a grin so wide it almost hurt. He'd smile until he meant it. He'd make himself feel better even if he had to force it. "Now, let's see how much shit I can get away with lookin' like a fuckin' tarantula twink."


	5. Pests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie gets caught up to the situation and Niffty is annoyed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey can you guess my sideship? Or at least ⅔ of my sideship cuz its an ot3...

Charlie found Alastor with Nuggets in the courtyard and he quickly explained the situation as far as he knew it to her. He was still smiling as always but he'd been hanging around long enough for her to read his microexpressions when they bled through the façade. She couldn't read him as well as Angel could but between the context she was given and the subtle tightness under his eyes it was no question that Alastor was worried.

"Is Angel still in your pocket?" She asked, kneeling to pet the pig.

"No. He's upstairs in his room." Alastor answered, much more subdued than usual. "I've sent shadows out in all directions to search but until the snake lands the blimp there's nothing to do but wait. I suppose I _could_ try to call on… Oh but that just won't do." Alastor continued with a shake of his head, more thinking out loud than actually talking to Charlie. 

Still, her curiosity was sparked. "Who could you call on?"

"No one you would wish to meet." Alastor dismissed. "And he certainly would not like Angel. Easy to offend, that one. I'm not risking Angel's afterlife trying to fix such a _small_ issue."

"I was asking for a name." Charlie tried not to react to the clearly intentional pun.

"Saying his name might draw his attention. I will not." Alastor answered. 

"Oh." Charlie said, no less curious. "Is he like… one of the other Overlords?"

"No, he isn't bound to Hell." Alastor answered easily, tugging the leash he was holding to try directing the pig back toward the door to get them inside. 

The answer left Charlie more confused. She at least knew of all of Hell's overlords, being comprised mostly of the Seven Devils which included her father and then their underlings the Goetic Demons, and Alastor himself who was the first Sinner to climb so high in Hell's hierarchy. She could think of a few of them who could be invoked with just the mention of their name. All of them were bound to Hell. Whoever Alastor was talking about it wasn't one of them. So did Alastor mean someone in Heaven, or somewhere else?

"Is he a God?" Charlie asked, following him and the pig indoors.

"Some think so." Alastor answered. "But some are wrong. He's more of a very strong Spirit. One of the Loa."

"Loa?" Charlie prompted. 

"A very strong one." Alastor confirmed. "But I don't want him involved. He's left handed."

"Aren't _you_ left handed?" Charlie asked, not understanding the distinction.

"Not with the few I care for." 

"Will someone call Niffty off?!" Came a cry from somewhere on the ceiling. 

Alastor and Charlie looked up to see Angel tucked up in a corner, a mess of webs around him as the ladybug was dusting them away.

"Darling, what _are_ you doing?" Alastor asked, amused at the sight.

"I was trying to make my own damn hallways. I can't go runnin' around the floor can I? Nobody watches where they're fuckin goin'." Angel huffed, trying to kick the feather duster away.

"The webs make everything look dirty!" Niffty protested, putting her free hand on her hip since the other was holding her up on the wall. 

"Niffty, dear?" Alastor asked, crooking a finger.

Niffty obediently climbed down and bounced toward the Radio Demon, who knelt down to her level to talk quietly to her.

"Angel needs a way to get around without being stepped on. Surely you can make some allowances for a short while?"

"Oh, but we don't want guests to think we have pests!" Niffty defended.

"One pest won't harm anything." Alastor replied.

"Hey!" Angel protested indignantly.

Niffty frowned and crossed her arms. "He should stay in his room if he's going to make such a mess."

Alastor's eyes narrowed but he spoke cheerfully. "Maybe you should have stayed in the Ring we're from if you're going to have such a temper!" His tone then grew serious. "I _can_ throw you back."

"Ugh!" Niffty huffed, but she dropped the duster. "Fine!"

"Glad we could come to an agreement!" Alastor said, standing and waving her away.

"Bit harsh." Husk gruffed from his space at the bar.

"Yeah…" Charlie agreed.

"I'm on a short enough leash only bein' allowed out of the hotel if you say so, Cha-Cha." Angel pointed out. "I ain't stayin' stuck in my room when this," He waved a hand to gesture to himself, "Ain't even my fault. That was kinda shitty, though, Al. Don't threaten our friends just cuz she's doin' what she's gettin' paid to do..."

Niffty only grumbled under her breath as she watched Angel resume construction of his webs. Eventually she decided it would be easier to ignore if she just didn't look up at all. She was short so it would be easy enough to ignore the ceiling. And if everyone though they had a severe spider problem then they wouldn't really be far off. She climbed up onto a barstool, and Husk made her a long island iced tea without needing to be asked.

"It won't last long." Husk tried to reassure her. "Once the idiots figure out how to fix it you can go back to doing your whole OCD thing."

"That's not what OCD is." Niffty corrected, still annoyed but calming considerably. "But thank you." 

Husk gave her a rare smile, then caught himself and went back to rearranging his stock. Everything was already in order, but it was as good of an excuse to look busy as anything. He wasn't very good at actively keeping anyone company, but he could just passively be there for his friend. He was sure any more attention than necessary would only bother her when she was in a rare sour mood. If she talked he would listen, but after the others left the lobby it was nice to share the silence with her.

Much later and after a refill of her drink Niffty had cheered up enough for Husk to talk her into a game of cards, using different colored candies instead of chips.


	6. Lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel's trying to make the best of the situation while Alastor is trying to fix it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Genie's in this bit! Noticed some of yall seemed to like her.

"So why do you call Charlie Cha-Cha?" Genie asked Angel, setting various bits of doll furniture on the vanity in Angel's room for him.

Genie had officially checked into the Happy Hotel shortly after healing. During her stay she and Angel had become friends, which turned out lucky because Genie liked to make dioramas out of dollhouses and had plenty of spare bits she could share. There was also the fact that she was endlessly entertained by a man who died in the 40s trying to understand modern slang and humor. 

Angel shrugged. "Cuz her name is Charlie and every time I turn around I catch her dancin'."

"And every time we kiss I swear I could fly." Genie half-sang.

Angel squinted at her, confused before realizing what she was doing. "That's another meme right?" He guessed.

"You pronounced it right! You're learning!" Genie clapped, turning back to her box she'd brought up she picked up a doll's bed, but frowned at it as it was plastic and in no way soft. "Okay I didn't think this through." 

"That's okay, dollface. I been sleeping in a shoebox full of cotton." Angel waved. "And sometimes in Al's pocket."

"That's so fuckin' cute I'm gonna hurl." Genie snickered. "Okay I got three tables. Blue, pink or green?" She asked, holding them up.

"You look me in the eye and ask me that again." Angel answered dryly, one set of arms on his hips. 

"Green it is!" Genie decided, setting her choice down..

"No!" Angel protested, shoving it off and onto the floor.

The conversation was brought to an abrupt halt as Alastor burst through the doorway. He looked a bit confused by Genie's presence before recovering and addressing Angel.

"How fortunate you are dressed! He landed!" Alastor cheered. "If we go my way we can catch him easily. If you want to come with me. Do you want to come with me?"

"Nah, I can't do shit to him right now." Angel said, clearly sad about having to be left out. He perked up easily though and took a running leap from the vanity and trusting Alastor to catch him, which he did. "I want a kiss before you go!" 

"Who landed?" Genie asked, eyeing Alastor warily. She hadn't been in Hell for long but she knew who he was and knowing that Angel liked him did little to ease her own discomfort at seeing him in person.

"The slithery bastard responsible for Angel's size issue." Alastor explained, kissing the top of Angel's hair and setting back down where he had been before. "Apologies for the interruption but I must go quickly or lose him again!" Alastor waved and halfway stepped, halfway fell backward into a shadow and disappeared.

"That happened." Genie acknowledged, shaking her head and raking her claws through the fur of her cheek. 

"Yeah." Angel said smugly. "I'm fuckin' marryin' that."

"You're insane." Genie said, picking the little green table off of the floor and putting it back in her box to give him the pink one instead.

Angel pushed it up against the mirror, smiling but not denying the question of his sanity. "You should see him after a couple pot brownies." 

"What the _fuck._ "

"He usually don't even like sweets so I thought he'd leave them alone. He didn't know what I put in it but I made them so he wanted one. And then he ate another one once the munchies set in before I figured out why he had such a big case of the sillies." Angel explained, laughing. "Fun few hours."

It didn't take long for Alastor to get to the blimp, tendrils erupting to grab on and keep it from escaping. Regrettably, he had to be careful. He didn't want to damage anything that could be a potential cure for Angel's unnatural smallness. Luckily he didn't need to be nearly as careful with the snake's henchmen, fragile and numerous as they were. He found he very much liked the sound of the eggbois cracking open whenever he broke one. It reminded him of a late breakfast on a slow, lazy, sit-on-the-porch-swing sort of morning.

"Pentious, do come out of there." Alastor asked, very politely all things considered. "I wish to speak with you."

"You _do_ remember me!" Pentious shouted through the speaker on the outside of the dirigible.

"Yes." Alastor confirmed, slowly turning the dirigible around in the tendrils as he looked for a way in. Unfortunately the entire interior was too well lit to use his usual method of teleportation and even Alastor had his limitations. "I remember that you have wronged someone very dear to me. All I want from you is to correct the situation." 

"I will correct nothing for you!" Pentious said, his hood flaring out. "You will rue the day you ruined my good name!"

"Pity." Alastor said, flicking away an eggboi that got too close to him. "I had hoped to be done with this quickly. I even came here prepared to bargain but if we must be stubborn then so be it." Alastor said, his tendrils squeezing the dirigible until he could feel something in it crack. "I'm sure whatever you built, you can build again."

"Wait!" Pentious protested, but the blimp just continued to crunch around him. 

A light went out. A shadow was cast. Alastor stepped through it and into the interior of the airship, looking around in equal parts curiosity and disapproval. 

"So bright in here." Alastor muttered, snapping his fingers. "I prefer a dimmer setting, me."

All of the lights went out, then. Pentious screamed. Alastor only laughed as the blimp was torn open from the outside.


	7. Delays

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor brings in a "guest."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure if i should tag my side polyship or not since it definitely is not supposed to be the focus but my heathen hands seem to just type whatever they want.

A live snake was hard to catch and prone to bite. A dead snake was much more manageable, Alastor mused as he bound a currently dormant Pentious's hands together behind his back. He coiled most of the long tail around the loop the connected arms made and tied that down too before hauling the snake up and off to the hotel. He wanted to get his quarry to a secure place before his crushed head reformed and he woke up. A few surviving eggbois followed at what they seemed to think was a safe distance. They couldn't follow for far as Alastor used shadows once again to pull the snake through them and into the hotel lobby. 

"Just. One. Normal. Day." Husk said, looking up at the ceiling in a tired sort of acceptance. "I ain't asking for much."

"God can't hear you." Alastor waved a hand at him, dropping Pentious carelessly on the floor. "Prayers from Hell won't get through. Don't be silly."

"I'm not praying to God. I'm asking the universe in general." Husk returned. "I'm too old for this shit."

"The universe doesn't care how old you are." Alastor snarked back with a grin, turning back to watch the snake bleed into the carpet. "Niffty, dear?" He called, but she didn't respond.

"She said if she can't clean up the webs that she ain't cleaning shit else." Husk explained.

"That doesn't sound like her at all."

"I'm paraphrasing." Husk huffed. "Related to that, I told her to stop being such a doormat to you and to take the day off. I'm sure you were bluffing but if you do throw her back where she was just for filing a reasonable complaint at you then I'll go get her myself. You ain't the only bastard who's crossed Rings by himself." He hissed warningly, knowing he was probably the only one of very few who could get away with defying the Radio Demon. "I understand you're trying to keep your boy as comfortable as possible while he's going through weird shit but there's other people here with feelings that matter too."

"Oh since when do you care about who I threaten?" Alastor dismissed.

Husk scowled, folding his arms and tucking his wings closer to his body. "I don't."

"Liar." 

"She's my friend." Husk sighed. "I can care about my friends." 

"Of course you can." Alastor chuckled, idly kicking the snake as he was beginning to grow bored waiting. "How's the _noise_ today?"

"Kind of quiet, actually." Husk cocked his head, confused. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Alastor chuckled but didn't explain. 

Angel came downstairs after hearing Charlie start screaming. Vaggie also was yelling something in spanish he couldn't understand but the reasoning became clear when he managed to get to the lobby to see Sir Pentious all tied up on the floor surrounded by blood stained carpet. 

"Cold water." Genie called, having carried Angel down since it was faster than his web network.

"And a lot of baking soda." Angel agreed. 

"Lucky the carpet is red!" Alastor cheered.

"Alastor you can't keep bringing in bodies!" Charlie scolded. "You haven't in months! Why now?"

"He's here to fix Angel! Just as soon as his head un-crushes itself." Alastor explained. "Not to worry! If he does as he's told I won't be eating him. That's fair, right?"

"Sounds fair to me." Angel chimed, hopping from Genie's hand to the bartop.

Genie sat down on a stool and spun on it to rest her back against the bar since she didn't have any wings to get in the way.

"No!" Charlie protested. "Stop eating people."

"I am not your patient." Alastor reminded.

"Stop eating people in the hotel!" Charlie amended.

"Can't you take him to the Radio Tower?" Vaggie tried to reason.

"Nonsense. He'd make a mess of the place." Alastor laughed.

"I fucking hate all of you." Husk groaned, dropping his head onto the bartop with an audible thud. Without looking up, he pointed in Genie's general direction. "Except you. You're not crazy."

"Gee, thanks Gramps." Genie smiled.

"One of your more recent patients, Baxter I believe? I may need the use of his laboratory and tools." Alastor decided to explain. He did have a reason for bringing the snake to the hotel specifically. "Regrettably I had to break all of this serpent's fancy toys so new ones will need to be made." 

Sir Pentious twitched, mostly healed by now and enough to try moving, though his cognitive ability was still very much absent. It had been the front of his head that had taken the brunt of the damage so until that had regenerated entirely he would be running purely on instinct and impulse. That was fine. Alastor could be patient when he had reason and the snake's intelligence needed to be on a full metaphorical tank before anything would be rebuilt.

"Baxter doesn't like to be bothered…" Charlie said quietly.

"Well I don't like being smaller than my favorite vibrator." Angel huffed. "Gotta sit on it like a fuckin' washin' machine and it's loud and _boring._ "

"Filter, Angel." Vaggie tried to remind him but knew it was useless to try.

"Nobody wants to know the shit you do." Husk agreed, muffled as he was still facedown on the counter.

Angel shrugged and sat down cross-legged on the corner of the bar, looking down at the snake on the floor trying to wriggle away even though he was literally tied in knots. He wondered what even was the point of making a shrink ray? Sure Angel was out of the way being so small, but he'd been out of the way for a while. He didn't participate in turf wars anymore and probably wouldn't for a while. He only ever did it in the first place because Cherri had got him into it and that it was a good way to work out aggression. Angel hadn't even been doing anything when he was shot except just walking. 

Angel hoped he'd be back to a normal size soon so he could kick the snake's ass himself. And also so he wouldn't have to have the outfit he'd already had tailored for his eventual wedding remade. He was going to look dignified as fuck for one day of his afterlife and some overgrown shoestring in a top hat wasn't ruining it for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technically great gramps but hey, who actually uses the levels of paternity in casual conversation?


	8. Negotiations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An engineer and a chemist meet in a hotel...

Charlie decided that if anyone was going to be disturbing her patients that it would be herself. A knock at Baxter's door was met with a loud metallic crash and an angry string of curses before the door opened.

"I'm busy. Very busy. Yes, time sensitive stuff. Go away." The small fish said, pushing Charlie away from the door. "No visitors. Shoo."

"I was actually hoping you could help with something?"

Baxter squinted, the glowing lure on his head quivering as he considered for a moment, then shook his head and looked back into his room. "No time for that. It might explode. Very bad. Very dangerous. I have to watch it."

"Watch what?"

But Baxter rushed from his doorway back into his room with a screech, leaving the door open in his haste.

"It's not supposed to be purple! Wrong!" Baxter shouted, taking the purple, bubbling test tube off of its burner and throwing harshly against the wall. "Have to start over! Have to--Your fault!" He rounded on Charlie, pointing up accusingly at the taller demon. 

"I'm sorry." Charlie said sincerely even though she didn't understand.

"No you're not!" Baxter said sharply, the bioluminescent parts of his skin glowing brighter in his anger. " Why can no one just leave me alone? _What do you want?!_ "

"We have someone for you to work with--"

"No!" Baxter interupted. 

"To build something." Charlie finished.

"Need materials. Can't make something out of nothing." Baxter pointed out. 

"It'll be taken care of." Charlie confirmed.

Baxter considered. "I get any tools I want?" He asked. "Any materials at all?"

"Anything you _need._ " Charlie agreed, hoping that the requests that Baxter made would be reasonable.

Meanwhile, Pentious had regenerated and recovered in full. He was still tied in knots, laying sideways uncomfortably on a couch in the lobby while he tried in vain to untangle himself. He was very unhappy to wake up in an unfamiliar setting with the Radio Demon still in sight as well as a few others. 

"Free me this instant!" Pentious spat, his hood flaring and the tip of his tail shaking angrily near his shoulder.

"Hm." Alastor hummed, a finger to his chin before clasping his hands behind his back and bending forward to meet the snake's eye level. "No!"

"Stop playing with him." Husk gruffed. "He's already down." 

"Kick him again!" Called Angel in contrast.

"Again?" Pentious questioned, before noticing the small figure on the bartop that had spoken. " _You?!_ I thought I killed you."

"Nope." Angel shrugged. "Still here! What, you thought you could make a holy gun out of Hell scrap?"

"It was _supposed_ to reduce you to nothing." Pentious explained. "Nothing to grow back if there's nothing left at all. It was an experiment anyway." 

Alastor's brow furrowed, his grin growing dangerous as he heard what the snake had meant for his weapon to do. Still, he wasn't about to go showing a soft spot to someone who he knew wouldn't hesitate to stab him in it. As much as he wanted to rip the serpent apart for daring to harm his partner he had to display an outward calm.

"Yes, about that gun. The effects need to be reversed as soon as possible." Alastor said.

"Why would I do that?" Pentious asked. "I've done you a favor. I'm sure that pest is more manageable now."

Alastor's claws dug into his palms behind his back as he thought of a way to answer in a way that would betray no weakness but would also not offend his lover. A lie that Angel would be able to see through and know to play along.

"I'm sure you know of the spider's profession? If he can fit in a pocket, very little can fit in him." Alastor explained. "He's useless this way." 

Angel knew Alastor didn't mean what he said but it still hit a bit close to his own thoughts. Enough to ache somewhere in his stomach. He ignored it and nodded along.

"It's true." Angel agreed. "Can't fit more than a pen cap in me."

Husk scoffed and left his station at the bar to leave the lobby entirely. Nobody stopped him.

"That is disgusting. A shame the gun didn't take your ability to speak as well as your size." Pentious said in a huff. "Crass wagtail."

"I don't even have a fuckin' tail." Angel pointed out, confused. 

"He's calling you promiscuous." Alastor explained.

"Oh. That's just accurate." Angel chuckled. "Cut the shit, okay? You built the gun that shrank me. You can build somethin' to fix me, right?" 

"I can build anything." Pentious boasted. "But _not_ as a damned pretzel." 

"Nice try." Alastor chuckled. "But I am not an idiot."

"He just needs his hands right? I got a chain collar somewhere that requires a key." Angel mused. "I think it's with the rest of my shit Vaggie took." 

"No!" Pentious protested.

"A very good idea!" Alastor praised Angel, then returned his attention to Pentious. "We'll just keep you tethered to a worktable until you can correct this blunder!"

"Absolutely not!" 

"Oh don't worry. You'll have help!" Charlie said as she entered the lobby, Baxter following behind her.

"Oh I don't like this one." Baxter said as he looked toward Pentious. "Not at all. Not one bit. Too loud. Too distracting. _Wiggly._ Just awful." 

"Oh come on. You're both scientists! Maybe you'll make a friend, Baxter!" Charlie just continued to try to make her own cheerful disposition bleed into the others. It didn't really work but trying was what mattered.

"Don't want friends. Waste time. Get in the way." Baxter huffed, but reminded himself that Charlie would give him whatever he requested until this silly project was complete.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure if I'm doing Baxter justice but I'm sure as fuck doing something.


	9. Communication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gotta talk it out sometimes.

When all was settled, shouting could be heard through most of the hotel as the two scientists chose to bicker before even beginning to start being productive. Angel, however, had grown quiet. Somewhere in the chaos of getting the serpent contained and the fish to actually accept the fact he was going to have to cope with someone else being in his space, Angel had climbed up the bar, into his webs, and off to his room without even a single word. Nobody saw him leave, but Alastor noticed that he was suddenly gone. 

Alastor double checked that Sir Pentious would be going nowhere, then made his way to Angel's room. Instead of travelling as usual, Alastor chose to walk so he could use the extra minute or two to think. It was unlike Angel to just leave without at least a snarky comment and his absence was sorely felt once Alastor noticed. He hoped Angel wasn't angry with him over his comment. He thought he had been transparent with the lie to anyone that knew of their relationship.

When Alastor let himself into the room, knocking out of courtesy but not waiting for an answer, Angel didn't appear to be angry at all. He just looked a bit dejected. He was back on the vanity in the makeshift miniature bedroom that he and Genie had set up together, sitting on a tissue surrounded by fine sand and brushing his naked fur with a travel sized toothbrush. He was being too rough about it, if the shed hair around him was any indicator.

"Everythin' a'right?" Alastor asked after closing the door.

"Heh, yeah. Sure." Angel answered dryly, resuming his brushing and pulling more fur out in the process.

"Y' only shed when you're upset." Alastor pointed out, pulling the stool of the vanity out to sit. "Talk t' me, sha. Please."

" I just…" Angel began, sighing and dropping the toothbrush. "I never expected I'd hear _my_ thoughts come outta _your_ mouth." 

"Oh…" Alastor said softly, having the good sense to be ashamed of himself. "I didn't mean nothin' by it. You know I think o' you more highly den dat." 

"Do you?" Angel asked, tossing his hands up. "You fuckin' said I'm just a useless hooker so you must've thought it at some point!"

"That is _not_ what I said!" Alastor protested, pulling back into the safety of his false accent and radio filter.

"You sure as fuck implied it!" Angel shouted, standing up and kicking the sandy tissue in frustration. 

"I was misdirecting!" Alastor shouted back, before forcing himself to regain a sense of calm. Arguing would solve nothing and at least one of them needed to stay rational. "I did so for your sake. No one outside of our closed little sect of friends needs to know what you are to me."

"Bullshit, you called me darling on live Radio for everyone to hear it." Angel huffed. "And hear me."

"Yes and then you were abducted." Alastor reasoned. "I do not wish to repeat that mess. I don't want anyone hurting you."

"I get hurt all the time. It's Hell and I'm a whore." Angel pointed out, still irritated but less aggressive.

"I don't want anyone hurting you because of _me._ " Alastor clarified, though he hated the thought of anyone harming the other for any reason. "And you don't have to be a prostitute. I am more than capable of taking care of anything you may need money for."

"I don't need you to be my fuckin' sugar daddy. You just don't like me screwin' around." Angel accused.

"We have been through this." Alastor pinched the bridge of his nose, then combed his claws back through his hair. This was not at all going well. "I do not care who you share your body with. Your body is yours and you can do with it as you like." 

"Well I like sellin' it." Angel said dryly. "I get laid and paid. Usually. Some bastards shoplift." 

"See now that you've said that, _that_ is the part I don't like." Alastor said, his expression darkening. "I don't suppose you have a list of names and faces of said shoplifters?" 

Despite the dark subject and sore mood, Angel couldn't help but let out a small snort. "Don't worry about it."

"I worry quite a lot." Alastor admitted, letting his smile drop completely and his filter fall. "I'm not de only one 'round with a holy knife squirreled 'way. I can't lose you jus' cuz I let slip who y' are t' me. Plen'y o' demons wannu rip my heart out, and dat's _you._ "

Angel deflated, sitting down again. Alastor set his hand on the vanity near him and Angel leaned against it, letting out a deep breath and a few tears he'd been holding back since coming up to his room. He sniffled, but thankfully it wasn't a heavy cry. His eyes shifted to the black band on Alastor's finger and reached over to run his much smaller fingers over one of the inset stones. Shed fur that hadn't yet been brushed out made him extremely itchy to touch, but Alastor supposed he deserved worse than a mild discomfort for causing Angel to doubt himself so strongly.

"I'm so sorry." Alastor said softly, hating himself for making Angel feel such a way. "I want to keep you safe, not be the one to hurt you."

"It scared me for a second." Angel admitted, and when Alastor didn't prompt him to speak further he did so of his own accord. "I thought maybe you were startin' to see me how I see me and if that ever happens you'll drop me in an instant. I wouldn't want to be stuck with me."

"Well I do." Alastor said earnestly before deciding a joke was in order because if Angel started to really cry then he was going to shred open everyone in this circle of Hell and then set himself on fire. "Y' aint gettin' de ring back, sha. It went an' fused t' my hand." 

Angel laughed, and Alastor knew they would be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo we ain't doin' that third act break up in my house.


	10. Deadline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel notices something and Niffty comes back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have y'all guessed what my polyship is yet? Cuz I might write it as its own part but I'm sure gonna hint at it here.

When Angel dressed himself the following day he noticed that his clothes that Alastor had specifically tailored for his new size felt just a bit more loose than they should be. He frowned, but chalked it up to loose stitches. He had to move a lot more now to make the same distance so that must be it. He made his way to his phone which was propped up on the mirror and kicked the button to turn it on. Pulling up the keyboard to text Cherri was what alerted him to the fact that he had to make slightly wider motions to type. 

"Al?"

"Yeh?" Alastor responded drowsily from the bed, having stayed up later than usual to keep the scientists downstairs on task and therefore actually trying to sleep in for once.

"I think I'm gettin' smaller."

Alastor sat up from where he lie on the bed, squinting over at Angel with his right eye closed. He frowned, looking around for his monocle and putting that on and scooting closer. He hummed thoughtfully as he reached for his coat which hung off of a bedpost, fumbling in a pocket before pulling out a rolled up measuring tape. He brought it to the vanity and Angel stood up straight.

"Four and a half inches." Alastor read out. "Weren't you a solid five before?" 

"I think so!" Angel confirmed.

Alastor recalled Pentious earlier words about his intentions for the ray gun's effects; _It was supposed to reduce you to nothing._ Alastor didn't like the cold spark of horror that it produced in his chest. If the intent of the weapon was actually succeeding, albeit slowly, there was a very strong chance Angel would truly be lost.

"I'm afraid we seem to have a time limit…" Alastor said, keeping his tone level. It wouldn't solve anything to panic, it would only further upset them both. He stuck the tape measure vertically on the mirror. "We'll keep an eye on it."

"...Fuck." Angel winced.

When Niffty came back from her offday she was in higher spirits, but extremely confused. Baxter was out of his room which _never_ happened and they appeared to have a new guest. They had started out in Baxter's room, but since there had been so many injuries springing from that in the span of only four hours, Charlie had relocated them to the lobby and given Pentious a longer leash so that he would at least be able to run, or slither, away from Baxter when the fish got violent.

"He can't stay in my room. Touches everything. Don't like him touching things." Baxter screeched.

"I have to touch things, you dolt!" Pentious said defensively. "I have to touch in order to build."

"You keep your dirty hands on your side of the table! Your side. Leave my side alone." Baxter continued.

"Dirty?!" Pentious shouted, hood flared and tail twitching. "Why I ought to--Oh?" 

Niffty had set a cup of tea on the work table next to Pentious, distracting him enough for his anger to fizzle away. She then set coffee next to Baxter, who was still riled up and didn't hesitate to swipe his cup onto the floor. It shattered.

"Rude." Niffty huffed under her breath before growing cheeful and bending to pick up the pieces. "Oh my! Whoopsie-doodles!" 

Pentious just watched her for a moment before hissing at Baxter. "That is no way to treat a lady!"

"Don't like clutter." 

"It's okay!" Niffty assured, taking the broken glass away and up the stairs. 

Upstairs was not where garbage usually went, but Niffty wasn't taking it to the garbage. She was going to break it up into even smaller pieces and leave them in Baxter's fresh sheets after she changed the linen. She also rearranged his chemical cabinet and replaced half of the saltwater in his tank with tap water. 

Husk, back at his station at the bar to 'supervise', covered a laugh with a cough. He knew very well that Baxter had just royally screwed himself. Spite was a talent of Niffty's and even if she couldn't retaliate at Alastor's earlier threat that she would be all but too enthusiastic to take her repressed anger out on the first person to annoy her. Baxter had just volunteered himself to be that person.

"Don't laugh at her!" Pentious said, rounding on Husk as he misinterpreted the laugh.

"Don't fucking tell me what to do." Husk shot back, raising a brow and waving a paw at the worktable. "Build your shit so you can get out." 

Pentious just continued to glare, but softened a bit as he picked up his own cup of tea to sip at it. It had been steeped too long, the bag was still in is, and he hadn't been given any sugar or milk for it but it was still a nice gesture. He could tell from the accent that Niffty was probably american and most of the more recently deceased americans he'd met thought tea was supposed to be cold and overly sweet for some reason. Still, it was a nice gesture. 

"What's her name?" Pentious decided to ask Husk, sorting through differently sized drill heads.

"Why do you give a shit?" Husk squinted, his lip curling on one side to show his sharp teeth. "Work." 

"Oh that's not a name." Pentious huffed, but resumed his task for all of four seconds before the powertool was snatched from his hands.

"Stop touching!" Baxter snarled.

"I can't work like this!" Pentious huffed, slithering as far away from the fish as his leash would allow. 

"You can and you will. Stop antagonizing each other. Like children, the both of you." Commanded Alastor as he descended the stairs, Angel on his shoulder. "Baxter if you can't play nice then I am going to skin you."

Baxter's lights brightened and his lure quivered, but he had the sense to fear the Radio Demon. Technically Hotel patients were off of the menu but with how little Baxter paid attention to anything other than what he himself was doing, he was unaware of that fact. He had no way of knowing that Alastor may be bluffing. And given the stakes on the line he may not have been. If Angel did really wither away to nothing, Alastor wasn't sure what he would do but he knew there would definitely be a massacre.

In any case the threat served its purpose and Baxter was a bit more agreeable going forward.


	11. Last Ditch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The situation is starting to seem hopeless. Angel isn't very optimistic but Alastor may have one very risky solution.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry i havent updated in a while. I've been working on things a bit out of order...

Alastor considered himself a patient man but it was becoming exceedingly grating on his nerves that absolutely nothing got done without him physically present to supervise(ie: threaten). It had been days. The gun to reverse the effects of shrinkage wasn't even half done. Angel was down to being only two inches tall. Alastor didn't want to think of losing him but every wasted hour seemed to be bringing that possibility ever closer.

"I shouldn't have torn the dirigible apart." Alastor lamented as he was once again tasked with pig-patting. "I thought since the ignoramus built it once he could build it again for the reversed purpose but apparently the lack of blueprints is detrimental." 

"Hey, you didn't know." Angel sighed, too small now for even the miniature bedroom on the vanity. "It's okay."

"It isn't."

"It will be." Angel said sternly. "Just take care of Nuggets for me, you been doin' good with that. Or if you don't want to, you can give them to Molly. Few decades and you'll forget all about m--" 

**" N O . "**

Angel startled, more at the openly distraught look on Alastir's face than the sudden and powerful boom of his voice that strangely echoed from the radio on the nightstand before the radio popped and sparked as it was far too close to the source of the power surge. 

Nuggets also startled, squalling and thrashing to be put down. Alastor did so, and the pig ran to hide in the bathroom, wedging themself behind the toilet. All was quiet for a moment save for the static jumping of frantically changing channels. 

Angel looked down, tracing the grain of the wood he sat on that were as thick as his thigh were he sat. The reconstruction was taking too long. He was shrinking too fast.

"Al, you gotta know I'm not gonna make it long enough for the screech squad to fix me." Angel pointed out, careful to keep his tone level even as tears stung his eyes. 

"Maybe _they_ don't have to." Alastor thought aloud.

"If we get someone else involved now it'll just take longer. There's no time. I'll be a speck soon." Angel reasoned. 

"I could… I could…" Alastor struggled to think past his strong sense of despair. After coming up blank on any new ideas, he fell back on what he knew. It was risky and perhaps foolish, but it was a chance for things to be alright again. "Someone stronger than me and smarter than the coldbloods downstairs could do something, I'm sure. I could make a deal."

"Babe, no." Angel groaned. "Don't get Lucifer in on this…"

"Not Lucifer." Alastor shook his head. "That fool didn't even cross my mind. None of the Seven Devils will come anywhere near you." 

"Who the fuck's stronger than you without bein' a Devil?" Angel asked, confused.

Alastor sighed heavily. He really never wanted to resort to such a thing. Desperate times, foolish measures. It was likely the deal he struck, if he managed it, would be less than fair. There was risk of miscommunication or lack of clarity causing problems later. Still, Alastor would do anything to keep Angel close for as long as Angel allowed it.

"My father."

Angel looked up, eyes wide, then he grinned. "I get to meet your dad?"

"It may not be a pleasant visit." Alastor said bitterly. 

"Oh…" Angel's smile dropped. "Hey I get that. My dad's an ass too." 

"I know." Alastor said. "In this case it is less that he is willfully abrasive and more of the fact that he is…" Alastor hummed thoughtfully, then sighed. "He's much like me before I met you and after I died, but even less forgiving."

"I didn't know you before you met me." Angel pointed out. "But based on what Vaggie said that's pretty bad."

"What did Vaggie say?" Alastor asked, his darkening worries derailed into curiosity.

"Oh just that you came to Hell, immediately established yourself as a Big Bad Bitch, and that you'd kill us all for fun." Angel said, waving his hands. "It was a long time ago, when you first came to the hotel.

"Ah." Alastor nodded. "I would have." 

"Oh." 

"Yes." Alastor confirmed, not even bothering to deny it. "Regrettably, I've come to enjoy all of your company. Specifically yours the most, of course." He grew gravely serious again, the momentary tangent circling back to what was most important in his mind. "I do not wish to lose you."

"I love you too." Angel answered what went unsaid but certainly not unheard. "So, uh… How do we get in touch with your dad? If he's older than you, I bet he don't have a phone."

"No, he doesn't. He's much more efficient than that." Alastor said, steeling his nerves in preparation for what he knew needed ti be done. "To avoid any _poor outcomes_ I need you to be on your best behavior. He cannot harm the living but he can absolutely effect the dead. Do not speak unless he asks you a direct question and answer as bluntly and briefly as possible."

"Shut up and sit pretty. Got it." Angel joked, though Alastor didn't find it very funny in that moment. 

Alastor took a deep breath, letting it out slowly and bringing glyphs and runes hidden within his soul come to the surface. His deathmark, the red X on his forehead and the center for his abilities glowed brightly and he brough a claw up to where he could feel it burning. He traced the mark, cutting it open. The wound bled black, as did the edges of his eyes like a macabre mockery of crying. He heard Angel gasp, but did not allow that to distract him. 

"Met Kalfu, may I request your presence?" Alastor asked.

Appearing out of shadow as Alastor so often did, stepped a grinning dark skinned man who smelled heavily of rum and gunpowder. If not for the aura that could be plainly felt around him, he could have been mistaken for a regular human man.

"I give y' my blood as a gift, boy." The man said, "And y' got de balls to ask fo' some'n else." 

Alastor did not answer, knowing better than to take a single step out of line. It hadn't been a question and he knew how easily Kalfu could take offense to anything he saw as an interruption. 

"...I thought your dad was white?" Angel spoke up, audibly confused before remembering what he had been told and clapping all four hands over his mouth. "Shit!"

Alastor closed his eyes, forcing himself to not curse. _Shit, indeed._

Kalfu, thankfully saw something humorous about the spider's lack of filter and the room filled with his booming laughter. "De horse was white." 

"Possession was involved." Alastor explained quickly, not wanting the situation to escalate if Angel thought the term 'horse' was literal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I understand that you cant evoke Loa by just asking for them with real Voodoo but Hell and the afterlife in general probably has different rules.


	12. Impulse Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor is having a weird and unpleasant time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kalfu's mood can shift on a dime and its awful

Kalfu took his sweet time looking around the room, picking things up for a closer look before putting them back wherever he pleased. It was annoying to Angel since it was mostly his things, but he'd already messed up by speaking out of turn once and he didn't feel like tempting fate more than he had. He did tense up quite a bit when Kalfu took a peek into the bathroom, his grin growing far too wide for the human face it was on.

"Hey piggy." Kalfu greeted, prompting Nuggets to wedge themself further under the toilet.

Alastor put his hand on the vanity, palm up and offering silent comfort. Angel climbed right on, sitting somewhat in the fetal position. 

Kalfu thankfully left the pig alone and snapped his fingers. The vanity stool quickly slid over and Kalfu perched on it rather than sitting properly. He cocked his head and rested his chin on his hand and his elbow on his knee. 

"So. Y' been doin' good fo' y'self. Got's a nice Tower out thataway." He waved the hand not supporting his head in the exact direction of the Radio Tower. "Wardin' to keep me out it, I noticed. An' now y' call me up 'cause y' need some'n." 

Alastor said nothing and Angel followed suit. Kalfu looked between the two, contemplative before finally asking a question. 

"Y' want me to make dis problem go away?" 

"I want Angel to be his proper size and stay that way." Alastor confirmed, sure to make his request specific. Being even a little vague left too much room for something to go wrong.

"Askin' a lot for a couillon what ain't even offered y' guest a drink." Kalfu chuckled darkly. "Aren't'cha?"

"There's a bar downstairs." Angel answered, noticing how Alastor's fingers faintly twitched around him.

Kalfu brightened, nodding to Angel appreciatively. "Now dat's a start!"

Alastor had been in Hell for a long time but this was shaping up to be the first time since dropping in that he really felt like he was. Of course Angel would mention the bar. In the lobby. Where there were other people for Kalfu to interact with and potentially decide he disliked them which would not turn out well. Why not just demolish the whole hotel and erase everyone in it while they were at it, since at this rate it was bound to happen anyway. 

"I will go get a few bottles and bring them up!" Alastor decided, not missing the narrowing of Kalfu's eyes. 

He would have to leave Angel alone with Kalfu, Alastor realised, but surely a few seconds wouldn't give Angel enough time to damn himself again. He nudged Angel off of his hand and stepped through a shadow from Angel's room to the lobby, ignoring Husk's protests as he grabbed every single bottle of rum. Husk was quickly brought out of his annoyance when he actually _looked_ at Alastor.

"You got a little, uh…" Husk said, pointing to his own eyes. "The fuck is that, ink?"

Alastor cocked his head, touching the underside of his eye. Black residue came off on his fingers and he sighed. He'd forgotten what effects summoning his father could bring.

"It's blood. Don't worry."

"Don't worry?" Husk echoed incredulously, "You're bleeding from the eyes!"

"Watch your volume." Alastor muttered.

"Anyone can see it." Husk pointed out.

"Not just anyone knows what color I bleed." Alastor returned. "And I will replace the rum later. My father is here."

"Your fa--Oh fuck no, Squeaker. Why--?"

"I will tell you later if I am able. I can't waste time right now." Alastor turned, hauling the bottles along with dark tendrils. As he passed the work table he used a louder tone. "Both of you shut your mouths and _work._ " Alastor said sharply to the scientists who had found yet another thing to argue about.

Another shadow and Alastor was back in Angel's room, along with every bottle of rum he'd brought with him. Kalfu was laughing. Angel was looking extremely concerned. Alastor hoped that it wasn't as bad as he had to assume it was. 

"What did you do?" Alastor asked Angel.

"Nothin'!" Angel answered defensively. "He asked why you had a ring on and I told him we was gettin' married. That's blunt and direct like you said!"

"Y' live y' whole damn life without even so much as a schoolyard crush," Kalfu said between peals of laughter. "Don't let nobody touch you," He slapped his knee and shook his head. "And now y' gon' get hitched to a damn whore. Dat's jus' crazy, ain't it?"

"I suppose it is. Just a bit." Alastor admitted. "But Angel is much more than a whore. He is my heart."

"Y' ain't had a heart since y' mama died." Kalfu said, switching from delighted cackling to a much colder tone. He snatched one of the bottles, downing a large gulp of it. "Too sweet." He muttered under his breath, but still continued to drink it. "When did y' go and get soft?"

"When did you start caring?" Alastor shot back, but instantly regretted speaking so impulsively.

"Don't y' disrespect me, boy. Don't pretend to think I didn't care." Kalfu bit, standing up. He was physically shorter than Alastor but he had a much bigger presence somehow. " I was wit'cha the second y' screamed y'first breath. I been right beside you every step since you started walkin'. Ev'ry time you cut some'n open just to see it's innards, dat thought started with _me._ Ev'ry time y' had de nerve to do what'cha needed to get what'cha wanted was _me._ Y' first taste o' blood, y' would've never thought to try without _me._ Even on de night you died I was runnin' with de dogs snappin' at y' heels, slowin' dem down."

Alastor looked downcast, but Angel just couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"If all that's true, he's in Hell 'cause of you." Angel pointed out. 

"I never forced him to do anything. I jus' put de ideas in his head." Kalfu clarified. "His sins are his own."

"But you encouraged them!" Angel defended. "Don't you owe him?"

"Angel," Alastor warned. 

Oddly, Kalfu just smiled. "Dat's an interestin' way to think on it."


	13. Think too Hard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kalfu is an experience not to be taken lightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angel is actually smart sometimes

"A'right, fo' dat one's smartass mouth," Kalfu decided, pointing toward Angel. "I'll tell y' what I'll do. If y' can tell me one thing y' lost 'cause of me, really lost, I'll give it back to you. If it turns out useful fo' y' situation, den all's fair. But it's gon' be y' last free deal, son." 

Alastor glared at Angel for a moment, but the rage in his head was soon overpowered by the fear gripping his chest. He needed time to think. Kalfu had been right before; Nearly everything that went right in Alastor's life could be attributed to the thoughts Kalfu encouraged through dreams when Alastor was a child. Later, with access to knowledge of lighter right-handed Voodoo from his mother and community and the darker, left-handed side Kalfu taught him in dreams.

His job at the local radio station, all he had ever wanted, only opened up when one of the hosts got sick which Alastor had influenced through service to Kalfu. He'd later killed the other host to keep the job, which Kalfu had suggested. It didn't take him long to realise that getting rid of those in his way was an effective way to do things and that eating what remained or cooking and sharing it was an effective way to dispose of the bodies. 

Killing humans as an adult was so much easier after being desensitized to the act by doing the same to small animals as a child. His mother had shown him how to prepare an animal for consumption but it was _Kalfu_ who pointed out that there wasn't much difference between a rabbit and a cat. Or a dog. Or any other creature he came across.

His mother joked sometimes that he had the devil in him but she didn't even know who really sired her child. In her mind, Alastor was the well-loved product of too many drinks with some lost tourist after watching a ritual for Papa Legba. She hadn't thought anything of the bloodshot eyes, assuming an addiction or issues with sleep. She hadn't known the ritual had also called Legba's twin. If she'd known she probably wouldn't have been so inviting. 

But Alastor knew. Kalfu had told him. Kalfu told him everything and gave him everything. Even it was just as indirect as his paternity.

"Take all de time y' need to think on it." Kalfu allowed, red eyes flicking toward the clock on the wall. "No rush or nothin'."

Angel, during this time, had taken to sitting with two of his hands steepled over his mouth to prevent any other outbursts. His face was scrunched in thought, though Alastor wasn't sure why. Angel didn't have Alastor's memories to sift through so there was no possible way for him to figure it out. Still, Alastor appreciated that he was trying to help anyway.

Charlie was getting restless. She could tell something dark was in her territory. Dark and _strong_. She had assumed it was Alastor at first but she'd become familiar with his specific aura enough to recognise that this new thing was separate. Even worse, it seemed to fluctuate between feeling passive and very, _very_ violent.

Charlie feared no demon. Not really. But this thing wasn't even a demon as far as she could tell. It wasn't an angel either. Why was it here? Unsure of what else to do, she followed the feeling to Angel's room. She knocked, but there was no answer and the aura stirred. Worried, she tried her skeleton key but the aura shifted again and the door fused to the wall. 

"Angel? Are you okay? Is Alastor with you?" She called, but only the Loa in the room heard her.

The door shifted, reality warping around it until it was part of the wall. Then there was just a wall, flat and plain and wallpapered. Charlie forgot what she'd come up for, shrugged, and went back downstairs.

"Wouldn't happen to have any gunpowder 'round?" Kalfu asked, swirling what was left the bottle of rum he was on. He'd had four so far. "Still too damn sweet."

"I haven't even tried makin' a gun since I got tiny." Angel said, standing and extending his arms. Several guns appeared, but all proportionate to him so he could hold them. "Best I got. Want me to shoot it?"

"Worth a shot!" Kalfu cheered, stepping forward to put the bottle on the vanity.

Alastor couldn't help but chuckle at the double-pun. Angel shot the bottle. The bullets _plinked_ off harmlessly, only about the size of a grain of sand and no match for thick glass. He let the handguns vanish, and manifested a tiny shotgun for something with more kick to it, then paused to look at it thoughtfully. He then looked up at Alastor, the X on his forehead still glowing under where he had cut it.

"It's a riddle." Angel realized out loud. "Al, you died when--"

"Ain't _your_ riddle." Kalfu warned the spider. "We could get along but I'll sew y' damn mouth shut."

"Don't hurt him." Alastor said quickly.

"Don't test me, den." Kalfu returned, settling back on the stool.

Angel wisely returned to how he had been sitting with his hands covering his mouth like he had been before Kalfu's playfulness had fed his own and caused him to drop his guard. Again. He just hoped Alastor could figure out the answer too. Kalfu had practically told them!

Alastor stopped bothering with his memories. Angel's revelation that it was a riddle was the clue he needed. He was thinking too hard on the wrong things when he should have been considering the question. What did he lose that could help Angel.

He'd lost his life in his early thirties. He'd lost _time._ Angel was currently losing time.

"Time!" Alastor answered.

Kalfu was gone just as suddenly as he'd arrived, not even bothering with a goodbye before vanishing. The bottles all went with him.

Angel was back up to five inches tall.


	14. Get it Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things seem to be taking a turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Life has been very life today so this is shortish. Sorry.

Angel was happy about the fact he wasn't so close to shrinking down to nothing anymore, but he was annoyed he seemed to be right back to where he started. He was also a bit disappointed in himself and his lack of self control. 

Nuggets, sensing that the potential threat was gone, slunk carefully out of the bathroom. They snuffled around the room, pointedly avoiding the vanity stool and, strangely, the door. They did a few rounds, checking everything in their reach aside from those two things, then finally went to the vanity and reared up on their hind legs to try to see the top of it.

"Daddy's okay, Nuggets." Angel assured the pig, then looked toward Alastor. "I'm sorry…" Angel said softly when Alastor had been still and silent for what felt like too long.

"S a'right." Alastor said, dropping the radio voice he had used as a sort of mental shield while Kalfu had been present. He picked Angel up and held the spider to his chest. "Y' mouth's gonna get'cha in trouble one day, sha." 

"It has." Angel snuggled close. "Repeatedly. Gets me out of trouble sometimes too~"

"Y' lucky he seemed t' like you." Alastor huffed. "Dat could've gone very sour _very_ quickly."

"Like me? He threatened me!" Angel pointed out incredulously.

"Yes. He usually doesn't bother giving warnings." Alastor chuckled. "Still worried me…" 

"I'm sorry." Angel said again. 

"Oh hush. I shouldn't 'spect y' to behave on such short notice." Alastor rolled his eyes.

Angel climbed up Alastor's chest to his shoulder, then up his hair onto his head.

"Y' could jus' ask me to put'cha on my head if that's where y' wanted to be." 

"More fun climbin' you like a tree." Angel teased, pulling himself up onto an antler. He nearly fell off when Alastor jolted. 

"Ah, careful on dose…" Alastor asked.

"They're fuzzier. Do they hurt?" Angel asked, sitting between antlers instead and staying as still as he could.

"Not quite." Alastor replied. "Dey mos'ly itch but dey ain't ready to scratch yet. Won't be fo' least a week, I think." 

"Your body's fuckin' weird." 

"You spit silk." Alastor chuckled, "Well if we are lucky you'll stay this size until we can fix you but in case you start shrinking again we best make sure that gun gets finished." He walked out of the room and downstairs instead of using shadow stepping since Angel didn't react well to last time he'd taken him through. 

When they got to the lobby, it was strangely quiet. Husk was on the outside of the bar standing at the head of the work table, arms crossed, wings flared, and tail lashing like he was about to hit someone with it. Sir Pentious was sketching out elaborate designs. Baxter was putting various small pieces together, for once calm. 

"Husker, how did you even do this?" Alastor asked.

"Niffty's idea." Husk admitted. "Baxter doesn't like people touching his shit so he's the only one doing the physical work. Pentious is used to having the weird egg things do the labor while he directs so he's giving Baxter instructions."

"If it's Niffty's idea why isn't she power posing over the idiots?" Angel asked.

"Because these two are _old._ " Husk huffed. "Older than me." 

"Oh right." Angel huffed. "Sexism."

"We can hear you." Baxter sniffed. "Loud. Distracting. Shut up." 

"You shut up." Angel shot back. "Get the gun done. I'm sick of bein' bite-sized."

"Shut up!" Baxter screeched.

"Will everyone just be silent! I am _trying_ to remember what the diminisher and reduction cables attach to!" Pentious hissed.

"Everyone, shut your mouths and get your shit done." Husk ordered, loud and low and leaving no room for fuss. "Angel, stop provoking people. Alastor, take your spider somewhere he can't be a distraction."

"Don't tell me what to do." Alastor deadpanned. "We were on our way to the kitchen anyway."

They hadn't been but since Husk seemed to have the situation under tight control Alastor figured now was as good a time as any to eat. Angel had grown and probably had proportionately less in his stomach. It was odd how being small had affected his metabolism. He didn't have to eat as much but it was much more often than before.

He picked Angel up off of his head, appreciating the fact Angel was taking care not to graze his antlers by lifting his legs out of the way as he passed over one of them. He heated up a plate of leftover spaghetti noodles for himself and scooped some of that into a smaller sauce cup for Angel. He set out a few coffee cups upside down with a small plate on top of one to serve as a table and chair for Angel, but leaned against the counter to eat standing.

Angel appreciated the gesture, but was a bit embarrassed that he had to eat with his hands. Nothing worked too well as utensils at his size. Toothpicks could have been chopsticks, but since Angel didn't know how to use chopsticks, it was a moot point. He'd given it a shot for a minute once, but he could never get his hands to work properly. 

"You're a mess." Alastor said fondly, amused as he watched Angel get sauce all over his hands. "It's cute."

"Fuck you." Angel grumbled, barely hiding a smile.

"I'd rather not." Alastor muttered with a wink.

Angel laughed, and consequently choked on his noodles for a moment. He coughed, then continued to laugh and shook his head. The past few days had been tense, so the joke was more than welcome.


	15. Wish Fulfillment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie and Angel wonder how to test the gun. Alastor has a pretty good answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait my brain got stuck on the polyship for a bit.

As far as Angel could tell by checking himself against the tape measure tacked to his mirror, he was shrinking again but it was a much slower process this time. So much slower that without the tape he may not have even noticed. Still, it was hard to keep telling himself that things would be fine. Pessimism kept creeping up on him every time he was alone for more than ten minutes at a time. So he decided to just not be alone at all, staying in Alastor's pocket when possible or if he was very desperate for company, pestering Husk or Charlie and Vaggie.

He was in the courtyard with Charlie, riding around on Nuggets's back. She was working on the garden, having managed to get sprouts started but not much else. It had taken forever, but she was a self-taught gardener and working on sheer willpower, luck, and guessing. 

"At least the gun should be ready to test." Charlie said cheerfully.

"Yeah but on what? It's gotta be something that's made of meat and ain't double-dead." Angel huffed. "Considerin' I'm made of meat and not double-dead."

"I don't want the gun tested on a person." Charlie said dejectedly. 

"Al could go catch someone real easy." Angel said, turning himself around on Nuggets's back since the pig was walking themself in a lazy circle while Angel was trying to maintain a line of sight with the princess. 

"I know." Charlie sighed. "And I don't like that I know. But maybe we should use livestock!"

"Not Nuggets!" Angel said quickly.

"No." Charlie agreed. "Maybe I could buy a cockatrice?"

Angel snickered.

"What?"

"Cock."

"Oh grow up. You're like seventy-two." Charlie huffed, but Angel could tell she was fighting a smile.

"Ninety-four if you count livin' time."

"I'm one hundred and nineteen if life counts!" Alastor reported as he stepped out into the courtyard. "What are we talking about?"

"Cradle snatcher," Angel teased at the same time Charlie answered. "Gun test options."

"Graverobber." Alastor returned to Angel.

"We're _both_ dead!" Angel laughed.

Alastor rolled his eyes as he turned to Charlie. "Well the best test control for a spider demon would be another spider demon, would it not?"

"I nominate my dad!" Angel called, being carried away to the blocks of broken concrete Nuggets liked to climb on.

"A capital choice!"

"No!" Charlie protested. "That is not happening. It could be dangerous!"

"Exactly!" Alastor cheered.

"I got a deathmark from before I actually died." Angel said, pointing to his left eye. "Dad can stand to get shot a little."

"If it kills him again it's just going to negatively affect your therapy." Charlie reasoned. "I'm going to buy a cockatrice. We're going to shoot _that._ No demons." 

"If we shoot livestock then how will we know reversing the effects won't leave the target braindead? I am not taking that chance." Alastor said sternly. "It must be something sentient." 

"Yeah, I'm stupid enough without help." Angel huffed.

Alastor went over to pick him up by the back of his little jacket, bringing him level with dangerously glowing red dials. "If you keep insulting your own mind I _will_ punish you for it."

"Ooh~" Angel cooed, "That a promise, Smiles?"

"Oh my Satan, what are you doing?" Charlie hid her face.

"Flirting!" Alastor answered cheerfully in stark contrast to his darker tone from before. "Positive reinforcement is good for him!"

"How is threatening punishment positive?"

"You don't watch my movies, do you?" Angel snickered, twisting himself to climb onto and up Alastor's sleeve to his shoulder. "Princess Vanilla."

"You're not even my type, Angel." Charlie rolled her eyes.

"I'm everyone's type."

Alastor turned his head slightly to loudly stage whisper to the spider. "She doesn't like fun so of course she doesn't like you."

Angel laughed, flopping to lean against Alastor's neck.

"Hey!" Charlie protested, wondering why the conversation always seemed to get away from her control whenever Alastor got involved. "I like Angel, just not like--"

"No man-stealing!" Alastor said turning away. "Come on Nuggets!" Nuggets squealed, following as they were called and allowing Alastor to pick them up. "Don't worry yourself with buying any animals. I believe I have a solution that will only be positive for everyone involved."

Charlie ducked her head, knowing Alastor was just going to do what he wanted to do anyway. She just hoped he would at least consider some measure of goodwill toward other demons besides the ones at the hotel on occasion.

It was later the same day when Alastor escorted a curious egg through the doors of the hotel. 

"Hey boss!" The egg called when it saw Sir Pentious, seemingly not concerned at all that its master was collared chained to a table.

"This little darling has been asking you to shoot it for years, so it tells me!" Alastor explained to the snake as he set the egg on the table. "And you have insisted on selfishly depriving it of the experience."

Pentious's eyes narrowed at the egg. "Just tell him everything, would you?" He hissed.

"Well it all started when Mister Boss Man was--" 

"No!" Pentious screeched. "That was sarcasm you ignoramus!" 

"No, by all means Number Twenty-Three. I am very interested in hearing all abou--" 

"Shut up!" Baxter huffed. "Always talking. Always loud!"

"Oh, you go back to your room if you can't be polite." Alastor ordered, several shadows springing up around the fish to drag him back to his room. 

"Fuck's sake just shoot the egg." Husk gruffed. "Faster this gets done, the faster you can go home."

Pentious hissed low in his chest, but agreed. He picked up the newly finished gun. He considered shooting Alastor instead, but the Princess was overseeing, as was the moth and the cat and the little cyclops. Even if he did shoot Alastor, the Radio Demon would probably retain his eldritch power and there were several other demons ready for an attack. So he shot the egg.

"Yay!" The egg shrieked in delight before it was out of sight, leaving a lump in an otherwise empty suit. 

Alastor rummaged through the fabric to find the egg, now no bigger than a songbird's egg. He picked it up, swiping the clothing aside. The egg was not bothered at all by its new size, far too excited by its wish finally being fulfilled.

"Shoot me again! This is fun!"

"Oh, hush." Pentious rolled his eyes. 

All of his eyes. It was an odd sight. He flicked a switch on the gun, in the same spot the safety would be on a regular firearm, before shooting the egg again. The egg grew instantly, shell cracking a bit from the strain of such quick growth but not enough to permanently harm. 

"Fuck it, I'll take stretchmarks." Angel shrugged, hopping off of where he'd been watching from a web and onto the table. "My turn!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Livin' the dream, #23. Good for you.


	16. Red and White

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel gets a bit more than a few stretchmarks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for blood and a temporary murder since demons regenerate

Even with a cracked shell the egg seemed fine, so they had expected Angel to be just as unbothered. Shells were brittle but skin could stretch. It should have been fine, so everyone was quite startled when Angel started screaming. As the spider grew, rips appeared under his fur like rips running up old stockings. He was bleeding profusely, many muscles exposed. The growth itself was quick, but the wounds would take hours to heal. 

Alastor had always thought dark red against white was a beautiful contrast, but this was the first time he had ever felt sick at the sight of blood. His first instinct was to comfort his heart, pushing down the urge to retch, but Angel only screamed at the touch and started to cry, cursing freely. The deer's next instinct was to behead the cause, his microphone shifting into an axe to do so. 

"Don't--!" Charlie protested, but the serpent was already headless and slumped on the floor while the egg hugged his body and sobbed loudly. 

"Stop killing people on the carpet!" Niffty scolded, running off to get a bucket.

"M'fine, Al." Angel said through clenched teeth. "I'll heal. I'm… I…" He couldn't continue, keeling over from the blood loss and shock. A moment later and he wasn't even breathing.

"Angel?" Alastor asked, nudging him.

Angel was completely unresponsive.

"Calm down. He's already dead, remember?" Vaggie reasoned. "He'll be back on his feet tomorrow."

"Won't even scar." Husk reminded. 

Alastor knew all of this. At least rationally. But panic had gripped him and he couldn't think past the sickening churn of his stomach and ice in his veins at the sight of Angel so still lying in his own blood. Was this how everyone else saw corpses? No wonder they were always so bothered. 

"Let's take him to his room." Charlie suggested. "He'll want to wake up somewhere familiar." 

"Put a tarp down!" Niffty called.

"Let me take him home." Alastor suggested instead. "Please. The pig…"

"Shit, yeah…" Husk agreed. 

Charlie was confused by what Nuggets had to do with anything, but with both Husk and Alastor having grown up in the rural south they knew what the smell of blood could bring out in even a sweet-tempered swine. A little was fine with Nuggets but they had never been around such a large amount of open skin. 

"If that's what you think is best right now. I'll take care of Nuggets until he gets better." 

Alastor nodded hollowly, gently picking the limp spider off of the table. No matter how many times he'd delighted in being drenched in the blood of others before, it felt awful this time. 

"You have to pat their belly after they eat." Alastor told Charlie, not giving her time to ask why before he and Angel were both gone. 

"Never cleans up after himself…" Niffty said, shaking her head as she reattached Pentious's. She rolled him onto a tarp and dragged him outside before getting to work scrubbing the carpet with a sturdy brush. "At least Angel was polite enough to just bleed on the table." 

"Oh don't be like that," Husk chuckled. "At least Alastor always does his own dishes." 

"This is not the time for jokes." Vaggie said dryly.

When Angel woke up he was practically mummified in bandages, which were soaked through red on top of being too tight. He had a migraine and everything itched and stung. He couldn't see, since it was dark, but he could smell past the coppery tang enough to know he was somewhere he'd been before. The constant switching through different frequencies just confirmed that he was somewhere safe, with someone safe.

"Al?" Angel asked, his voice strained as he was still in pain.

"I'm here." Alastor answered in the dark, and Angel felt a hand grasp one of his own. "Where y'at, sha?"

"Feel like hell." Angel answered. "How long was I down?"

"'Bout six hours." Alastor answered. "Night, now."

"Shit."

"Y' wouldn't stop bleedin'."

"Yeah. Had worse though. Fuckin' razor wire does the same shit but repeatedly." Angel huffed, trying to sit up but groaning when the action pulled the skin of his back apart again.

"Jus' lay still, sha." Alastor gently pushed him back down. "Don't move too much. I'll get'cha whatever y' want." 

Angel couldn't stop himself from crying and he hated how childish he felt for it, but he was too tired and hurt too much to keep any of his thoughts in his head. 

"I want my Ma…" 

As much as Alastor wished he could drag a soul out of Heaven just for Angel, he knew there was no way he could do so. Still, he knew there was a next best thing.

"How does Molly sound?" Alastor asked, hoping she would be enough. 

Angel sniffled. "Okay." 

"I'll call 'er right now and we'll get 'er over here fast fast." Alastor assured. He didn't have Molly's number, but that's nothing a few radiowaves couldn't solve. He pulled up his microphone to start sifting through frequencies until he found the right one. He bypassed the need for her to answer the phone, taking over the speaker and cutting off the music she had been listening to. "Molly will you come to the Radio Tower? Your brother needs you."

_"Alastor?!"_

"Yes. It's urgent." 

_"Gosh, okay. I'll be right there. Do I need to bring anything?"_

Alastor looked to Angel for any input. He was still crying but starting to calm. He'd probably fall unconscious again.

"Just yourself."

_"Gotcha."_


	17. Those Who Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel heals. Molly helps. Alastor listens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last bit of this one. Working on the wedding itself which should be a twoshot but I'm trying to get it perfect.

Molly arrived at the Radio Tower in record time, having forgone getting a driver and stealing a car herself. She ignored the defensive shadows that sprung forth from the walls as she kicked the door open. The smell of blood hit her, strong enough to make her wobble on her feet a bit, before following it to a dark room. She was less aggressive with this door, but still drew a revolver from her soul, just in case. 

She entered the room to find her brother lying bandaged on a massive cushion on the floor, Alastor sitting beside him and looking up at her solemnly. Molly pointed her pistol at the radio demon and he knew better than to argue with that. He was the stronger demon and they both knew it, but it would be better for Angel if Molly was at ease and even though on an average day Molly liked Alastor as her brother's fiancé, she still knew him primarily as the Radio Demon and couldn't turn that knowledge off. Not while there were already factors putting her under stress.

"What the fuck happened to him?!" She demanded, coming forward and stepping onto the cushion once Alastor had given her a solid five feet of space. 

"Science gone wrong. He'd been shrunk."

"Yeah, he texted me about that…" Molly nodded, sitting and pulling her brother onto her lap. She put the gun away and wrapped all four arms around the other spider. 

He hissed in pain, not fully waking but adjusting himself to curl against Molly's chest. She frowned and pet his hair, unbothered by the blood. 

"Well when we tried to unshrink him…" Alastor looked away. "He's back to the size he should be but his skin didn't grow as fast as the rest of him. He'll heal of course but he's bled out twice now."

"Why'd you call me here? Ain't shit I can do." Molly huffed.

"He needed comfort and I'm not who he wanted it from."

"He asked for Ma, didn't he?" Molly guessed easily, holding a hand gently over Angel's left eye. "We been here before…" 

"I'm sorry to bring you back." 

"His brain was all mixed up. He'd see me, call me Ma. Had to explain to him a time or two Ma was dead and he'd be so confused. Say 'No, I just saw her.' and I'd tell him he saw me and it'd go around in circles like that for weeks. I fuckin' hated it. Couldn't stand him for the longest and I knew it wasn't his fault but… It hurt." Molly sighed, rocking herself and Angel gently. "He'd either act like a two year old or he'd just sit and stare at nothin' and nobody else wanted to take care of him."

"I want to take care of him." Alastor said.

"Well where the fuck were you then?" 

"Already here in Hell, I expect." Alastor shrugged, taking the dry angry joke for what it was.

"Well don't let this happen again." Molly huffed.

"Be nice to 'im, Molly," Angel slurred, clearly not fully awake. "He's sensitive an' is a secret."

Molly snorted while Alastor just look scandalized. 

"Don't tell nobody. He gots a rep to keep." Angel continued, snuggling further into his sister's many arms. "He gotta stay lookin' like a Big Bad Deer Daddy or somebody's gonna try kickin' his ass."

"Don't call me that and nobody can kick my ass." 

"I can kick your ass." Angel challenged playfully before giggling. "You said the ass word." 

"Has he taken something?" Molly asked, trying and failing to keep a straight face.

"I gave him morphine for the pain before he fell asleep again." Alastor admitted. "I'm unsure of his tolerance so the dosing may have been a tad high…" 

A few hours passed with Alastor and Molly talking quietly. Angel kept drifting in and out of consciousness, but finally woke up enough to stand with help so his bandages could be changed. He was all scabbed over but the bleeding had stopped. A stubborn few minutes later and Angel had convinced himself he was okay enough to walk around and wasn't taking any well-meaning criticism on the fact.

"I'm fuckin' hungry. Let me do shit." Angel gruffed, hobbling out of the bedroom.

"Probably iron-deficient too…" Alastor pointed out. "I can make something."

"I'll help!" Molly said, hopping up.

"Fuckin'... Jambalaya." Angel said, continuing out and leaning heavily against the hallway wall as he went. "Al, your mama's jambalaya."

"You know, it has been a while, hasn't it?" Alastor agreed, taking a lead while being sure to give both spiders a wide berth for Molly's sake.

"I don't think I've ever had jambalaya." Molly said, following quickly. 

Angel gave into his body's weakness once they got to the kitchen, slumping into a chair. Alastor quickly got to work, pulling ingredients out of the icebox, mostly vegetables and what was definitely someone's leg. Molly winced at it and turned her attention back to her brother. He looked unbothered, happy even though he looked like he'd been through a meat grinder, as he watched a man shove someone's leg through an actual meat grinder to make sausage out of it.

"You've got weird taste in guys, Angie." Molly leaned and whispered to him. 

"Bitch, you ain't got room to talk." Angel snickered. "You been screwin' Cherri."

Molly's eyes widened and she hid her face. "She told you?!"

Alastor looked up, having not been listening until Molly's shrill tone caught his attention.

"Nah. You did. You drunk-called me like a month ago." Angel explained. "She's been smellin' like spider off and on for longer than that though. Surprised the fuck outta me. She ain't one to date. She's… fuck what's the word. Not asexual, she's as bad as me. Aromantic?"

"I know." Molly nodded. "It ain't nothin' serious anyway."

"Good. Don't get your heart broke." Angel warned. "Not lookin' forward to havin' to kneecap my best friend cuz she made my sister cry." 

"Oh shut up." Molly huffed.

Alastor just continued cooking, listening but not intruding on the conversation. 

Back at the Hotel, Pentious had revived and slithered off. Finding his airship a wreck, he set orders to the eggs to rebuild before going back to the hotel. It _was_ a hotel after all, and he suddenly needed a place to stay. Charlie was happy to oblige, knowing that though he wasn't there to be redeemed that maybe the idea would grow on him while he was there. It didn't, and he left as soon as his blimp was finished. Charlie was just glad to have helped. 

Alastor returned with Angel a few days after they'd left. Angel's fur was thinner in a few places but he looked healthy and fur grew back. He was still clearly shaken by what had happened, but overall happy. Nuggets was ecstatic to see him, squealing and rushing to the spider as soon as they heard his voice. 

"Alright before anymore crazy shit happens, I'm gonna go make sure I still fit in my drexedo." Angel declared, picking Nuggets up and strutting to his room.

Alastor stayed behind, knowing he wasn't allowed to see the outfit. Charlie approached.

"He's okay, right?"

"He will be." Alastor assured.


End file.
